transposable element

a lot will happen tonight for the first time.

for the first time, i’ll see regine velasquez do a concert. never been an avid fan, though i’ll concede that she’s got a powerfulful voice. they won’t call her pinoy pop diva for nothing.

first time in the jahrhunderthalle. first concert to watch in frankfurt.

am gonna meet M for the first time and i’m excited. we’ve been having long phone chats the last couple of weeks and it feels as if we’ve been friends for a long time already. save perhaps for the first 5 seconds, it never felt awkward talking to her. hopefully it’s gonna be te same in person.

am gonna meet A, too. we haven’t had any communication yet, but M assures me that she’s nice and, to borrow M’s term, a “normal pinay”. i think that’s already a great starting point.

i’ll be staying over in frankfurt, so that means it’s the first time my beloved son will have to sleep the whole night without mama. he will fall asleep without major problem, i know that. but i hope he won’t make a big turmoil when he wakes up in the middle of the night and finds mama’s bed empty. oh well, he’ll just have to make do with dada.

am so excited. and nervous. i so want this night to be fun, fun, fun. it’s the first time in years that i will be hanging out the whole night with girl-friends. no husband, no son in tow. geez, excitement is drowning out the tiny bit of guilt i feel for leaving my boys behind. oh well, i’ll make it up tomorrow when i’m back home. promised!

geez, it’s nearly the end of february and winter still doesn’t show signs of abating. this must have been the longest winter i’ve had. not the coldest, because i remember braving -15 degrees last year to bring J for a pedia check-up. this year hasn’t been extremely cold, but i don’t recall having snowfall this late. spring is sure taking her sweet time coming. i wish she would just hurry up because packing a toddler who can’t keep still and starts squirming away after 5 seconds is starting to get on my nerves. well, what can i expect when i myself start to loathe the sight of jackets, pullovers, gloves (which i hate wearing so my hands look and feel like that of 80-year old)?

J needs to move and run around, try out the equipment at the spielplatz, jump on puddles, play at the sandbox. but in this weather, gee, getting out of the house already takes us more than a quarter of an hour (and that’s if he’s cooperative). and when we’re finally at the spielplatz, he’d want to play for hours and would never want to go home again, despite freezing hands, cheeks and most probably, feet, too. he’d wail and squirm and arch his back when i declare it’s time to go. sometimes i’d give in and stay, but the problem is, with his perpetually running nose, i’m not sure we should be staying so long outdoors. so in the end i’d have to bribe him with a fruit bar or a brezel so he’d sit back in his buggy on the way home. bad mother!

anybody knows of a mantra to entice Spring to come?

so here i am, writing my very first blog. for an IT semi-illiterate like me, that’s quite a feat. i’ve had several false starts, but i think i’m finally getting the hang of it.

so why this blog? here are 5 reasons i’ve come up with:

1. to talk to family and friends means overseas calls. too expensive if you just wanna catch up on the latest gossips.

2. when depression hits me (which is rather often in this gloomy weather), it seems unfair for a normal living human being to act as my emotional trashbin.

3. i’ve got a poor memory. i’ve got to write things down. twenty-five years from now, i want to be able to dig up the answer somewhere if my son wants to know what his first word was.

4. at any one time, in my mind run several lines of thoughts that never seem to get finished. maybe writing them down will create something sensible out of them.

5. more and more of my friends are making blogs, opening their hearts’ content for the world to read. a window to what’s going on in their minds. but i sometimes feel like a cheat, reading their blogs and not offering them a peek into my mind as well.

so there. my first blog. bow.