ironing out life’s little ironies
ruth: “i found this job announcement in naturejobs. i think i’m qualified. shall i give it a try?”
hubby: “this sounds good!”
after 2 minutes…
hubby: “you know, i just read this article this morning saying that the environment during the first three years has the greatest impact on a child’s development. after that, it’s all a play of genetics. so we really should have a look that jan is getting enough stimuli…nurture…potential…blah-blah…”
oh. right. i forgot; i already have a job.
***
is it just me, or is it really human nature to want what is not there? to yearn to be in point B when you’re at point A? and when finally reaching point B, to be wistful of being back in point A?
***
and when you reach crossroads, do you also find yourself unconsciously leaning towards people you trust and whose opinions you value? not to explicitly ask for opinion or guidance, but just to remind yourself of your own core values and beliefs? perhaps to reassure yourself of the context of your own principles?
If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!
16 Responses to “ironing out life’s little ironies”
January 26th, 2005 at
uy ako na naman una. hehehe. ruth, walang pinakamarangal at pinakadakilang propesyon sa mundo kung hindi ang pagiging isang ina. darating ang panahon na ikaw ay magbabalik tanaw at wala kang pagsisisihan sa desisyon mo ngayon, sapagkat si Jan ay lalaki bilang isang mabuting mamamayan na magbibigay sa iyo ng karangalan sa iyong pagtanda. mapalad ka at hindi mo kailangang maghanap buhay upang mapalaki ang iyong supling. lasapin mo ang sarap at hirap ng pagiging isang ina, ito ay magpapatibay ng iyong pagkatao at magdudulot ng ibayong saya sa pagsapit ng dapithapon sa ating buhay. (whew nahirapan ako do’n)
January 26th, 2005 at
rhada: grabe…lalim naman ng tagalog mo, natulala ako! hahahaha.
ruth: rhada is right. take it from the expert here. hehehe. (expert, kuno!) actually, noon, i used to look down at myself kasi i’m not working and all. pero, there was this article in “chicken soup for the soul” that I read and it really changed my whole perspective as a stay-at-home mommy. i realized my value not because of how much labor i’ve put into this so-called “job” (which is not a joke at all!) but because of how much my family appreciates my effort. I think, the reason behind my resentments of quitting my job and all these sentiments of staying home all the time came from having all those battles with my son, which in turn made me so stressed and exhausted, physically and emotionally. but everything brought something great in the end. maybe not in the eyes of others who do not understand…but in the eyes of my family, who matters the most.
January 26th, 2005 at
utang na loob, nag-balagtasan pa si rhads hahaha pero, sapul ang point!
sabay-sabay nating isigaw: Tayo Ay Tanging Ina!
January 27th, 2005 at
lucky are those mothers who have partners/husbands who are great providers. If I had one, I wouldn’t think twice, I’d stay at home and take care of the kids and the household (+ the hubby of course!) he he.
To those stay at home moms (kahit yung mga working moms din): I highly recommend the inspirational/devotional book “Calm in my Chaos” by Elizabeth Corcoran.
January 27th, 2005 at
dats wat are prends are por
to remind you of who you are in times that you forget
to remind you of what things you stand for in times when you need validation
to sing to you your heart’s true desires when your own memory fails…
January 27th, 2005 at
rhada, di ko tuloy alam kung seryoso ka ba or nagpapatawa. hayaan mo’t sa susunod na halalan, ipangangampanya kita. hehe…
des, maybe nga home stress lang ito… or feeling the pressure from a society that still thinks that stay-at-home moms do so because they CAN’T have a profession.
justice, tanging ina? am way far from that and i know it.
January 27th, 2005 at
ruth, compared to me? (patience wise), hands-up ako sayo.
January 27th, 2005 at
glo, great providers? hm, actually, low-maintenance lang kasi kami pero occassional bouts of materialism is part of what lures me to get back to working. plus, it seems now or never for me. alam mo naman sa field natin, hindi ka pwedeng out of circulation for a long time.
delish, mismo. you had the words i didn’t had when i wrote this entry. salamat.
January 27th, 2005 at
on the now or never issue, career-wise: personally, kung sakaling full time mom ako ngayon…in 6 or years when Raine is at school and has his own busy schedule…then i can get back to work, but any kind of work for that matter. Siguro nga by that time, Ok lang sakin na boring office work na lang, o kaya eh tindera ng ticket sa sinehan o dili kaya naman ay yung uso ngayon na tagasagot sa mga call centers. my point is: Ok lang kahit hindi na yung pinag-aralan ko o hindi na intellectually stimulating…basta something na iba na i will still enjoy doing.
he he…sori sa litanya.
January 28th, 2005 at
hey ruth — i know what you mean. When I was a SAHM for 6 months, I longed to go back to the work force. I felt USELESS just leading a domesticated life with nothing to show for at the end of the day except for unfinished house chores, dirty dishes and the like and NOW that I’m back working, I WANT to cut it in half so I can spend more time with Bea (i.e. being home when she gets out of school at 3pm) BUT I have made some compromises by asking for a more flexible work sked (i.e. leaving work at 3pm 3x a week) to spend more time with Bea AND have the flexibility to attend her school activities where parents are invited to.
However, iba rin tayo ng pananaw when it comes to child rearing. I don’t feel BEA lost out on having a happy and nurturing environment because I was working full-time when she was a baby (although I did it out of necessity rather than choice at the time). She’s such a smart, active, happy, well-adjusted child at 7 y/o with a very sunny disposition (pag walang topak hehe), what more can I ask for? Well, I hope this last till adulthood
January 28th, 2005 at
xtine, i agree. bea didn’t miss out. but you had your mom and you went to work knowing that bea got the best ersatz TLC what with all the loving relatives around doting on her. kaso, i don’t have that luxury over here.
January 28th, 2005 at
di bale…konting months na lang…jan will be three…that means….free ka na to spread ur wings uli?….;-) how’s the daycare system at ur place?
January 29th, 2005 at
mrs14… yes, that’s what i thought too, kaya nga ako itching for a change… daycare for 0-3 yo can be costly, but starting from 3, there are lots of options. hm, but then comes the next question: what about a second child? aray ko, mid-life crisis na yata ‘to! hehe… the blog entry seems to simple, no? but when you dig deeper, maraming ramifications yan. haaaay…
glo, naisip ko na rin yan. but, well, you know… the ghosts of egoism, materialism and insecurity peeks every now and then. staple na yata yan when you’re a stay-at-home mom. when you have 2 minutes free to let your thoughts wander, they invariably turn to “what if’s” and “what could’ve beens”… hay naku, i need major enlightenment!
January 29th, 2005 at
i so agree in all points, ruth. we always yearn for things we don’t have and in the process fail to appreciate what we already have. also, i always turn to my friends when facing a fork in the road, not because i am not sure of which direction i want to take, but because i need to be reminded of where i’m coming from.
February 1st, 2005 at
ang sagot ko sa last paragraph series mo, ruthie, ay… OO. sabi nga nila, parang dagat ang desisyon natin. if you’ve made a decision that came from the innards, then it’s stable. kahit anong agos ng alon, kahit anong bagyo, hindi yan magbabago.
anong konek don sa affirmation sought from loved and trusted ones? kasi parehas kayo ng heart’s vision, diba, so you trust and hope that they will see things the same way you did. diba?
when they make tutol (please ignore that atrocity, it’s da towt dat kowunts) but you’re solid deep inside, sabi nga sa aming mga bading, keber (kiber). kasi minsan, panindigan lang talaga yan. omigaz, diz iz siryuz. *bow*
February 1st, 2005 at
i forgot… thanks for being honest, ruth. i think my older sis is in the same boat pero she will never admit to the whisperings or yearnings for the material life. when i told you (in one chat, if i recall correctly) that i want a job, i felt din your need to be useful and productive, to have the financial freedom to do what you want. when i told my sis that, well, i just got this sermon on how to put my life second to that of my son and husband, that god will lead the way etc etc etc… e shempre i believe in all that empowerment b*ll that’s floating around…
turuan mo akong mag hyperlink, ruthie.