transposable element

the berks are doing another round of posts, each member answering the so-called proust questionnaire. i hope i can find the time to answer the whole lot myself, but let me start with this one: what is your greatest fear?

like many, i fear death. not as much as my own, but of the people i love, the people around me. whatever will i do without my husband? will the sun shine as bright without jan? and mia– i get nightmares just thinking about SIDS and other accidents that may befall such a vulnerable infant.

the logical side of me says death is as natural as life itself. it’s inevitable. it happens to everyone, it’s just the manner in which it happens that varies. if one’s lucky, you can prepare for it to a certain extent. compare life insurance quotes and get it all sorted out. a memorial plan and a will makes it easier for those left behind to deal with financial issues, too.

but what about the emotional loss? could you help others to cope with the grief of losing you? i suppose there’s only one thing you can do to make death easier to accept: live life meaningfully.

last week, i was amusedly watching the reactions aired on tv regarding the launch of playboy philippines. i can’t understand why people make so much fuss about it. they say it degenerates people’s sense of morality? ah, and those gyrating scantily clad girls on a noontime tv show don’t? what about those politicians who blatantly steal from the nation? is that the sense of morality the nation should emulate? or should we idolize celebrities who openly and proudly admit they go to vicky belo for more than just acne treatment? a few years ago, you are scorned if people find out you went for cosmetic surgery. now, if you listen to the celebrities endorse belo, it’s as if you’re not worth your salt if you’ve never had a vanity op done. is this the sense of values we should try to encourage our people to have?

at the end of the day, it’s literature. it may sell like pancakes, it may flop. if people would rather leaf through playboy than go through more distasteful material in the national papers or television, so what? as if the country has no other more pressing problems to tackle.

having been a scientist myself once upon a time, i am all for advances in medical and scientific research. i appreciate the extent of drug treatments available today for all sort of maladies for which, some decades ago there were no available treatment. i get excited and am hopeful whenever i come across discoveries, big or small, that have the potential to improve the quality of our lives. but this news stumps me: a woman-turned-man getting pregnant.

According to the story, Mr. Beatie was born a woman but decided to become a transgender male and legally changed his sex to male. He had his breasts surgically removed and started bimonthly testosterone injections, but kept his vagina.

Now identifying as male, Mr. Beatie legally married Nancy Beatie, the story says. The pair wanted a biological baby but Ms. Beatie was unable to carry a child. So they decided Mr. Beatie would carry the child.

“How does it feel to be a pregnant man,” Mr. Beatie writes in the article. “Incredible. Despite the fact that my belly is growing with a new life inside me, I am stable and confident being the man that I am. In a technical sense I see myself as my own surrogate, though my gender identity as male is constant. To Nancy, I am her husband carrying our child … I will be my daughter’s father, and Nancy will be her mother. We will be a family.”

what is the world coming to?

it’s been more than 2 months since i joined the bandwagon and decided to write entries in this blog containing links to certain websites and get paid a bit of coffee-money for it. while it hasn’t exactly made me rich, it had at least paid for the maintenance of this blog, as well as two others. the hosting for this blog alone, with its 4-years worth of archives, is no longer insignificant.

that trickle of income aside, i do enjoy writing the entries. i find it can be a creative exercise, it widens my vocabulary (how was i supposed to know festool is a brand of drills, saws and other workshop equipment? i thought was german contraction for constipation, haha!).

but probably the best outcome so far, is that it has provided me the prodding i need to update this blog more often. links withstanding, they are a peek into my day-to-day life, my past, my insights. perhaps with the exception of one or two, the entries i’ve written were no blatant advertisements or endorsements.

or were they?

i received this image via email (i suppose it has been going around, so i’m sorry, but it’s impossible to trace to whom the credit is due), and i just thought it was quite extraordinary, if not downright incredulous. i mean, how often do you see such ads?

click for a larger image

what job do you think would fit the guy? considering his experience, i think he should have been commissioned by the FBI (or CIA?) for their drug bust operations and give him the opportunity to use his background (and contacts, perhaps!) for something positive. either that, or a counselor or even manager of a drug rehab center.

well, it’s been about 7 years since this ad was placed. i wonder what became of him?

the philippines is sending this lady to the miss world pageant.

which elicited reactions from a lot of pinoy bloggers, media, and former philippine beauty titlists:

i disagree with ruffa. proficiency in english does not equate to “having brains”. indeed some of the most intelligent people in the world do not speak english at all.

during the interview, janina displayed an obvious lack of english proficiency. but, so what? that in itself is not an indication of her IQ. however, the fact that she could not even manage one coherent sentence is quite telling, considering that this lady must have had at least 10 years of english classes (assuming she finished high school level at least). nobody should expect perfect grammar, but is it too much to ask for one sentence that makes sense?

on the other hand, connie is right. it’s just a beauty pageant after all, and beauty, she has.

if there’s one thing i’m scared of, it’s being in debt. when i was still single, i had a visa card, and though i found it very convenient to use for shopping cash-free particularly when i traveled, i always made sure i paid the bills in full when the payment was due. i never needed more than one credit card, and i never fell into the lure of spending more than what i could pay.

fast forward many years, and nothing has changed as i happened to have married someone equally nervous with liquidity. we’re not rich, but we can proudly say we’re debt-free.

however, if there’s one thing that would make me overcome this stance, it’s the prospect of possibly owning a place to call home. if one considers the amount we pay each month in rent, money that could have already been used to pay mortgage on a property instead, it simply makes sense.

it’s a scary step, though. where? how? how much? when? what if we buy a property at the wrong time? is there a possibility for a mortgage refinance? it’s a complicated financial strategy, one i’m not well-versed myself, but as i understood it, in home mortgage refinance, one takes a second loan to pay off the old debt in full, and then save some money in paying off the second loan which, presumably offers better mortgage rates. this refinance home mortgage website, for example, offers information on how it works in several states in the US, and a free quote, depending on the location and type of property you want to refinance, and your credit rating.

i wish such possibilities were open to us. i wish we already know where we want to settle down for keeps. i wish we would have the courage to take such a big financial move. i wish.

or should i maybe just wish that i’d win the lotto?

as i get older, i get more and more impatient with overdramatic people. we all get our share of problems and frustrations– parenting woes, health problems, marital discord, faulty relationships, career dissatisfaction, death in the family, financial binds… it’s one or the other and at some points of our lives, we’ve all been through it. we’ve all been through that stage when we thought we were at our lowest.

it’s ok to be sad (just don’t hit the malls when you are). it’s ok to be depressed. but what gets my goat are people who play the “woe is me” act over and over, as if they wallow in the pity of others. hoodiathinkyouare? some kind of special person who owns the monopoly of problems and frustrations in this world? dude, if even after several months, you can’t pull yourself out of the dumps, maybe you need professional help. stop the spiel; it’s getting stale.

what would you spend them on? i’m not talking about savings from the house budget or such, but say you had an extra source of income, perhaps a small trickle, maybe not more than a few dollars here and there, but extra nonetheless. would you spend them on luho treats you normally wouldn’t buy? perhaps save for an LV bag, a pair of jimmy choos, or a breguet? or would the money find its way into the house budget and help pay for daily stuff like grocery, utilities, school fees and such? what do you really need extra money for?

being the first sign of the chinese zodiac cycle which runs for 12 years, the year of the rat signifies new beginnings. it is said to be a good year to begin a new job, get married, launch a product, make a fresh start, or simply start something new (ala high school musical, hehe). however, don’t be rash; decisions made during this year will have long-term consequences.

if you’re like me who’s born on the year of the rat, it seems 2008 holds a lot of promise, according to chinese astrology.

The clever rat has made many ambitious plans that will be put into action this year. Good fortune and good times will surround the rat in this year of glory. Easy social grace is a gift of those born in this sign, but trusted close friends and family are the center that the rat needs to secure prosperity. Beware of the battle of earth and water that may confuse the scurrying rat. This beginning of the year will see the rat tempted by many flirtatious relationships. Faithfulness and loyalty are difficult with so many admiring glances. Understand the fear of those you care for as you seem to be drawn to many new relationships. Take steps to avoid damage to your true partners. As the year passes the successful rat will see more serious relationships bear fruit. Although the rat is a water sign, boat crusies are not a good vacation plan. Travel to exotic lands to explore,meet new people and experience adventure may be the perfect honeymoon. With the influence of the earth aspects of this year, promises of commitments become real and those born in this sign may experience the blessings of marriage and of children added to their family. The rat who cannot focus on success will be misled and find much conflict and many uncomfortable scenes caused by straying from a match that will bring good fortune. When prosperity and love come easily they may not be treated with respect. The rat who will succeed is the one who remembers that greed and manipulation may bring quick victories but ultimately strenghten enemies. The cat is ever watchful of the rat who stole its place. Listen to the guidance of ancestors, loved ones and trusted friends. Beware of the flattery of casual admiration to completely fulfill the promise of extreme good fortune that this year holds.

sounds fab. except that i haven’t made any ambitious plans. i’ve learned to keep dreams simple and attainable. i guess i’m too grounded to aim for moon and stars. i know what i can do, what i can accomplish. and geesh, flirtatious relationships? i’m heavily pregnant, for pete’s sake! at least they got the addition to the family right. as for the rest, it’s a good piece of reminder for all of us, rat or not.

i’m not sure how much significance i should credit horoscope schmoroscope with. i don’t really believe in such, and they only interest me at the start of the year. i look them up mostly just for fun and out of curiosity, shortly after which i immediately forget all about them. but going back to the forecasts for the year of the pig for rats and looking back at how 2007 panned out for me, it is just too tempting to believe that there was a reason why 2007 has been a turbulent one. the question is, am i ready for 2008 and beyond? are you?