transposable element

ah, and so the groove comes back. i’m taking to blogging again, and hopefully, it will stay now. i regret the one year hiatus; i hate to think that years from now, i will look back on this blog and feel that there has been a one-year gap in my life. one year that hasn’t been blogged about, hasn’t been chronicled in any social media. pity, as it has actually been one colourful, eventful year.

one thing i was sure, though, is that it was never in my plans to stop. afterall, i didn’t cease paying my domain renewal and hosting fees. it was just a matter of finding the time and getting the ball rolling again.

i’m approaching another turning point in my life. this time, i won’t leave it untold.

my facebook status reads: would you rather be a big fish in a pond or a small fish in the sea?

it’s telling of the next life steps i’m pondering on. actually, i think i’ve pretty much decided what’s best for me even before i posed the question. i’m ready for more. i want more. and i’m willing to exchange being a driver to just being one of the spokes in the wheel, if that’s what it will take me far distances.

because like flowers in the wild, this fish needs more room to grow.

first and foremost, i probably should change my template. it’s dated, and it’s not me anymore. my tagline is inaccurate, and so is the ‘about me’ section. i’ve ceased to be a wahm about this time last year. i am technically no longer a trailing spouse, no longer my husband’s ‘dependent’, having since received an employment pass of my own, with the privilege to stay in this little red dot on my own rights. i no longer consider myself a scientist-on-hold; i’ve given up hopes on me ever returning to the experimental bench. i no longer have the interest nor the aptitude for it. i am no longer a medical writer-wannabe; my employment pass and business cards say i am a full-pledged one.

and yet, the very core of me remains true. i am still a proud pinay, as proud as ever, if that is even possible. i am still my children’s crazy mom, driven more crazy than ever before, juggling work and household responsibilities 5 days a week, leaving home in the morning with the feeling that i should be staying at home, coming home feeling i should never have left, but spending the entire day at work feeling fulfilled. crazy.

a template change is due. now if i could only remember my cpanel password…

i’m currently writing an article on breast cancer and it makes me want to check term life insurance rates for myself. see, i’m terrified of the big C. i lost my father to it, and many other acquaintances. it could be the age, but i’m hearing of new folks succumbing to cancer on a regular basis of late. and it’s not like i’ve led a health-conscious lifestyle so naturally, i’m worried. sometimes, on morbid moods, i think that it could be just a matter of time.

my first ever profile pic when i started my foray into the blogworld in 2004. jan in 2006, and now, mia.

what do they say about being chips off the old block?

i’ve been baking gooey sugar-laden cinnamon melts yet again. i think this has become my comfort food, next to sinigang and tocino. and leche flan, and turon. and planters cheeze curls. and giotto and nutella. arrgh, maybe i should add apidexin pills to the list.

at what age does one start with those anti-aging creams? i was at the drugstore yesterday planning to buy one of those new-age regenerist wrinkle creams from olay as a pasalubong for my mom. but when i saw the print model and realized that she couldn’t be a day more than 25, i wondered– maybe i should get a jar for myself, too?

according to webmd, while some doctors also share the same skepticism, saying there are no published medical studies showing they work, experts involved in product testing say there is ample science behind the technology. and if you read the adverts, it’s almost convincing.

have YOU started using these fountain of youth “potions”? and? are they effective?

on and off for the last several months, i’ve been baking cinnamon rolls, using recommended recipes on the web. i’ve tried a number of them recipes, but none has given me the gooey cinnabon copy i was expecting (and i’m getting closer to needing a Lipofuze treatment in the process, ack!). maybe it’s me, maybe it’s my oven with its dodgy thermostat. i’ve finally created a recipe variant that actually tasted good, but made me frustrated because, well, because it’s just not it.

and then a couple of months ago, mcdonalds reintroduced their cinnamon melts and that was it. no more baking and toiling in my overly warm kitchen. mac’s cinnamon melts tasted like they collected the cores from cinnabon rolls, tossed them into a bowl and poured heavenly cream sauce over it. bliss!

but alas, some good things never last. the cinnamon melts are no more. they’re back to boring old apple pie for dessert. but ah, the recipe is plastered all over the web. i’ve finally gotten to bake a batch the other day and man, they are gooood.

out of the dozen i’ve baked, there’s one single tin left. not for long!

i’ve known these ladies since we were pregnant, and have had many many play dates with our babies and toddlers over the last two years, but this is the first time we’re all going for a girls’ night out. yeah, we’re doting mothers like that, ha ha.

anyways, i’m mighty excited. it’s not gonna be a formal tuxedos-and-cocktail dresses gala at the esplanade, nor will it be a wild alcohol party at clarke quay. we’re just not cut out for those. but half a dozen girls at the mid-row of the cinema, watching sex and the city… we’re up to some giggle-gaggle filled fun!

it’s not that i’m overly overweight. i think i’m fine on the weighing scale. it doesn’t mean i’m fit, though. i tire easily, and muscle tone is a distant memory. i know that even the most effective diet pills won’t help me with that.

was it ralph waldo emerson who said something like “when you really really want something, the universe will conspire to give it to you”? so why don’t i have a flat tummy yet?!? ironically, it actually feels like the world is conspiring NOT to give it to me. whenever i start something on the road to a trimmer midriff, something always crops up to keep me from progressing. arrgh!