transposable element

i see crow’s feet starting to form. age spots here and there. a white hair every now and then. but if there’s something that undeniably tells me that i’m getting old, it’s the various diseases and ailments friends my age are starting to complain about. perhaps i’m one of the fortunate few whose organs are so far asymptomatic of disease, but lately, i’ve had a few friends going under medical procedures for varied reasons. gall bladder removal, kidney radiation, chemo treatment for cancer, surgery for abdominal hernia, diabetes, thyroid problems, hypertension. it sounds as if life is starting to take its toll on our bodies. sometimes, it scares me when i realize that these are people in my age group, living a lifestyle approximately similar to mine. when will it be my turn? and it scares me even more that apart from a private health insurance from a german provider, i have no health savings account to speak of. ouch.

on and off i’ve been entertaining the idea of going back to school. not a phd (i already gave up on that a long time ago) but something more technical, more skill-based. if one can earn an online degree on nursing, i would be interested, as i’m not keen on studying here in singapore. and much as i would have preferred to study in the philippines instead, i couldn’t very well leave the rest of the family here in singapore, huh? so distance learning would have been a good alternative, except that nursing isn’t exactly cut out for distance learning, eh?

oh well, perhaps i’m better off building on what i already have instead of pursuing something altogether different. i know i enjoyed teaching at the university, both in the philippines and in germany, so i could probably aim for an online teaching degree. or i could build up on my laboratory research experience and attend a refresher course on the advances in biotechnology. or perhaps i could further my writing and specialize in scientific and medical writing? ahhhh, that’s the quandary of being a jill of too many trades. it’s a struggle to choose!

these recent episodes with illnesses (mine, hubby’s, the kids’) make me want to pack up and escape. i’m starting to imagine that i’m breathing in stale air, stuck in a densely-populated city that sees many travelers from flu-infested cities in the northern hemisphere.

dominican republic vacations are out of the question, but i’ve been thinking hard if we should bite the expensive airfares to manila. with the thousands of OFWs going home for the holidays, december is the most expensive time to fly to manila, it seems. gawd, i so want to fly home, if just to catch up on sleep and not have anything kitchen-related to do for a couple of weeks.

but i’m foreseeing a number of major expenses when the new year comes in, and my left brain (purportedly the logical side) says that an unplanned trip right now is just not going to cut it. and my right brain (allegedly the imaginative side) can’t come up with a way to make it happen. sigh.

i’m running a fever. yet again. i can’t remember the last time i got sick before these last episodes. it’s been far too long since the last time i was starting to think i was invincible. and then this. three in a row.

well, the say bad things come in three’s, so i hope that’s already the end of it. sure, it helped burn fat, but i’ve also lost much more. it’s not so much the cost of medicines and doctor’s fees (thank zeus for health insurance!), but really, these bugs have already zapped away more than two weeks of my life!

no, it didn’t take me this long to recover from a bad bout of tonsilitis; the poor bugs have been flushed out of my system by the ueber-antibiotics i was prescribed with in just three days. however, hubby, who came down with the same symptoms at the same time i did seems to have either caught something else on top, or succumbed to some opportunistic bugs that have been til now laying dormant in his system. he’s still down as of writing

of course that also means that i’ve been carrying double parent duty most of last week. and i’m afraid there isn’t the end of the tunnel just yet. oh well, one’s gotta do what one’s gotta do.

ironically, i realized i’ve actually been enjoying the time i spend with jan these days. since mia was born, we somehow drifted apart a little, me taking care of mia and hubby taking care of jan. now we’ve kind of rediscovered each other, and it’s actually rather fun having him around. talk about blessings in disguise. he still drives me up the wall now and then, of course, but he wouldn’t be jan if he didn’t, eh?

but man, am i tired. wish i could take up one of those outer banks vacation rentals and whisk off the entire family for a rejuvenating holiday!

because my first batch were not satisfactory, i made a second batch, this time using a recipe that boasts to be a copycat of the cinnabon recipe. i was already salivating, i even used the more expensive bread flour that the recipe called for, instead of the usual all-purpose. and dang, it didn’t work. i had rolls that were as hard as stones; the dough didn’t rise.

huh? what went wrong? i had to find out so i tried it again. and failed again. maybe third time lucky? i made yet another batch last night, the third in about 24 hours, and when i brought them out of the oven at half past midnight, they went straight to the bin. dang.

now if there’s one thing i learned in my years of doing experimental research, it’s that it takes many many trials to perfect a protocol. i just had to give it another go… until i find out what’s wrong. and today, following a slightly different recipe, my efforts paid off:

yummy! an antidote to even the best diet pills. and no, i don’t think there was anything wrong with the other recipe. i think the yeast i used were just half dead.

for some reason i can’t remember, i’ve recently resolved to watch all the james bond films, so the last couple of weeks, hubby and i have been having bond marathons as soon as the kids are in bed. we’ve seen casino royale (daniel craig), octopussy (roger moore), the world is not enough (pierce brosnan) and from russia with love (sean connery). i know i’ve got a long way to go before i can say “i’ve seen them all!”, but i hope i can find dvd copies of them in the first place!

who is your favorite bond actor and which is your favorite bond movie? no spoilers, please!

it’s been a week since i rediscovered facebook, and i still don’t quite know what to make of it. i can see how it’s become the social networking of choice for many, combining friendster, chat, email, blog, photo sharing and other applications all rolled into one. i see a lot even busy with cattle supplies on their virtual farms.

however, i’m not yet so comfortable posting “what’s on my mind” just like that.

you see, one thing i realized is that my facebook connections or “friends” are people i’ve crossed paths with over the last three decades or so. there are those i’ve gotten to know just recently, and there are those who still remember who were my pals in third grade (details even i don’t remember anymore!). i know them at different levels. some are family, close friends, former colleagues, and there are a handful i have remotely worked with and have never even seen personally. and i’m not exactly sure if i could easily share my thoughts (pictures, links, etc) with A, a tech guy i absolutely have nothing in common with except that we used to work for the same blogging network, compared to B, who probably already knows every significant event in my life anyway, facebook or no facebook.

but, and this is the part i am enjoying, i am blown away how i got reconnected with so many friends and classmates from way back. people i haven’t seen in decades, and all it takes a simple “heya, how are you?” to bring back the memories buried deep deep into the recesses of my mind. it’s amazing how a few postings melt the time and geographical gap, making it feel like you never lost contact at all. it’s like a class reunion, sans the awkwardness.

facebook also made me face a character flaw: i am so bad at keeping in touch with friends. j is giving birth soon and i didn’t even know she was pregnant. v is pregnant with her second, and i haven’t heard from her since high school graduation. n is now a lawyer, and i am still confused as i know she had a bachelor’s degree in zoology. and dozens more of such revelations.

i realize that i need to make more effort to keep communication lines not just open but also active if i want to nurture friendships, considering i’ve relocated many times and likely to move residences again in the future. ahhh, maybe i’ll be a facebook fan after all.

we’ve been married for nine years.
working together, building a family together, working towards goals together.

it’s already been nine years? sometimes it feels like it was just yesterday.
it’s only been nine years? sometimes it feels like it’s been forever.

for the last couple of years, my husband and i have stopped celebrating our birthdays with the usual party pomp. we’ve been opting for short travels when the schedule fits, or simple celebrations with the family. my birthday this year wasn’t any different. and frankly, i couldn’t ask for anything more.

woke up (extra early) to a birthday cake baked by hubby and several presents, one of which was a personal pick from jan. took a nap with mia and woke up to a flood of phone and email messages from friends and family. had a great dinner at a german bistro near our place. and as i drifted off to sleep, i realize that at 37, i have every reason for having a happy birthday.

…a loving, dedicated and obliging husband.
…two smart, confident and assertive children any mother would be proud of.
…family whose support i could always count on.
…in laws who love me like their own.
…friends i could run to in times of need.

because truly, at the end of the day, it is our relationships with those around us that puts the ‘happy’ in happy birthday.